Don't Know If You Love Me Or You Want Me Dead

❥Pairing: Hanzo Hasashi/Kuai Liang
❥Word Count: 3156 Words
❥Rating: Explicit
❥Warnings: Hate Sex, Face-Fucking, Restraints, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Grief/Mourning, Oral Sex, Rough Oral Sex, Light Bondage, Angst and Porn, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Suicidal Thoughts, Kuai is having a bad time :(
❥Prompt: Hate Sex + Face-Fucking + Restraints

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Hanzo’s footsteps echoed on the stone floor, making his way to the cell furthest inside the dungeon. He tried to not use the dungeons much, there really was no need when they had more effective and easily accessible holding cells within the Fire Gardens. This one was only to be used for their most troubling and heinous of guests.

And well, you couldn’t get more heinous than this.

Kuai Liang glared from behind the bars, on his knees and completely restrained against the wall with a mix of cuffs and a crisscross of chains. He looked pissed. Not as pissed as I am.

“Is this really how you treat your guests, Grandmaster Hasashi?” Kuai spat, trying to fight against the chains across his chest. “Throw them in the dungeon to rot?”

“Guest?” Hanzo snarled, opening the cell door and slowly ambling over. “My men found you sneaking into the treasure room.” Once close enough, Hanzo reached down and grabbed Kuai around the neck. “Is that how you treat people you are supposed to be in a peace pact with? By waiting for them to turn their back and then steal from them?”

Kuai said nothing. He didn’t even try to deny what he was doing. Hanzo felt his anger rise, tightening his grip and threatening to cut Kuai’s breathing off.

“What were you looking for? What were you hoping you steal from us?” Hanzo questioned, baring his teeth and growling. Kuai still said nothing. “Well?”

“I’m not telling you anything,” Kuai snarled. Hanzo had no idea where this hostility and secrecy had suddenly come from. Granted even now their relationship was still filled with bickering and fights with each other, but there had not been this level of vitriol for years.

“What the fuck’s gotten into you?” Hanzo demanded, trying to read Kuai’s body language, but it was impossible when he was locked down so tight. About the only thing he could make out was Kuai’s hands balled into fists cuffed up beside his head. “You haven’t been this pissy with me in a long time.”

Kuai bitterly laughed before spitting out “fuck you.”

“Don’t tempt me.” Hanzo let go of Kuai’s throat. “Are you going to answer me, or am I going to have to get drag it out of you?”

“Oh, I wonder how you intend to do that,” Kuai snidely answered, and Hanzo narrowed his eyes. “I should have known having me restrained on my knees wasn’t a coincidence.”

Hanzo reached for Kuai’s chin, lifting his head up. Kuai was so hard to read sometimes. He was clearly mad about something, and yet for some reason, he still wanted Hanzo to fuck him. They’d been through a situation like this before, where Kuai was upset and had believed giving himself to Hanzo to be mistreated would help.

“This isn’t a repeat of what happened after you destroyed the Cyber Lin Kuei is it?” Hanzo wanted to make sure, just in case. The last time he had Kuai genuinely sobbing in his bed was awkward, and all he could manage to do to comfort him was tell him he wasn’t the monster he thought he was.

“No,” Kuai muttered lowly, looking away. “No, it’s not.”

“You’re clearly angry with me about something though,” Hanzo pointed out. Kuai wasn’t acting like he usually would. Not taunting Hanzo to enrage him into treating him rough. This wasn’t the annoying bratty charm Hanzo had come to enjoy. This was just suffocating anger.

“Right now, I’m pissed we’re having this conversation instead of you fucking my face.” Kuai tried to fight against the restraints again, but it did very little to help his situation.

Hanzo weighed up the possibility that Kuai had broken in with the intent of getting caught. It did feel like something he would do. It was just his anger was a little too real and no where near bitchy enough. He supposed all he could do was play Kuai’s game, and hope that a rough throat fucking would persuade Kuai to tell him exactly what was going on.

“Very well,” Hanzo agreed, reaching down to unbuckle his belt and pull away his clothes just enough to get his cock out. He was half hard, because even if he was confused by the situation, there was always something hot about Kuai tied up before him. “If I do this though, you are going to answer my questions and explain what you were looking for.”

Kuai pouted, before giving a loud frustrated sigh and said “fine.”

Well, he guessed if this was how he’d get to the bottom of this all, then so be it. He pushed forward, pressing his cock to Kuai’s lips. The other man took a deep breath to steady himself, before opening his mouth up. He began to feed his cock inside, Kuai screwing his eyes shut as he did.

“Open your eyes,” Hanzo ordered as his cock hit the back of Kuai’s throat. Kuai did not obey, so he pulled his hips back and roughly thrust in again. Kuai choked and opened his eyes, and for a flash second looked like he was considering just biting Hanzo’s cock off. “If you even think about using your teeth on me, I’ll leave you locked down here until you learn how to play nice.”

Kuai growled, but the vibration was nice on Hanzo’s cock so he couldn’t complain. He reached down to grab Kuai’s hair, keeping his head still. Normally he might have had Kuai do the work himself, but today wasn’t the day for that. He pulled out, and slowly pushed back in. He felt his cock slide along Kuai’s tongue, lips clamped around and thankfully he didn’t feel any teeth.

He started slow, or at least, slow-ish. As he drew back he was agonisingly slow, letting the anticipation of it build up, before he drove back in rough. Kuai gagged a few times, but didn’t do anything to indicate he was genuinely uncomfortable.

He risked going a little faster, although his retreat was still a little on the slower side. Watching his cock leave and then disappear into the surprising warmth of Kuai’s mouth was always delightful. Kuai for his part, tried to keep his lips tight around him, his tongue always tasing his skin. Every so often, some precum leaked out of his cock, and he felt Kuai swallow it.

“I do not know what this was all about,” Hanzo grunted between the jerks of his hips. He was getting so much faster and rougher. “But you do always look your best with my cock in your mouth.”

He gave a particularly rough thrust, and Kuai gagged rather violently. As he closed his eyes a tear rolled down his cheek, but otherwise he made no indication he wanted things to end. Hanzo was trying to be acutely aware of Kuai’s apparent mood, even as he was loosing himself to pleasure. His thrusts were becoming desperate now, deep and every so often he heard his balls hit with Kuai’s chin with an audible slap.

He was getting close, and as much as he would like to continue, strip Kuai and fuck him against the wall, he also had to choose his battles. And right now, that battle was getting answers to what Kuai was doing here.

He could always take Kuai back to his room later anyway.

He pushed Kuai’s head back against the wall, before forcing his cock further and further down, until Kuai’s nose was touching his pelvis. As he came, he felt Kuai’s throat contracting, swallowing the seed as it was poured into his throat. He held them there like that, before he finally made his exit. Kuai gasped, like he was desperate to get air into his lungs. Hanzo decided he could give him a moment to recover.

When Kuai’s breathing grew quiet and returned to normal, Hanzo decided the interrogation could begin.

“Now that is done,” Hanzo rumbled, and Kuai’s head slowly lifted. God, even though he got what he wanted, his was still looking at Hanzo with such contempt. “What were you looking for?” Kuai silently seethed at him, Hanzo reached down to lightly slapped Kuai’s face. “Hey, we had an agreement. I fuck your face, you tell me what you were looking for.”

Kuai looked like he was about to explode, but finally he growled, “Bi-Han’s mask.”

Hanzo felt himself falter. After he had murdered Bi-Han, he had kept the mask as a memento, a trophy even, to remind himself that he’d gotten the vengeance he sought.

The fact he actually hadn’t really didn’t cross his mind when he’d made the conscious decision to hold on to it beyond the truth being revealed.

“I overheard Takeda telling Cassandra you had it,” Kuai snarled, and Hanzo could see the way his body was trembling. He doubted it was from the strain of the restraints. “I want it back.”

“Why?” Hanzo questioned, not really understanding why Kuai would break their pact for a fairly inocous item.

“Oh, I don’t fucking know, Hanzo. Maybe because it’s the one thing my brother owned that hasn’t been destroyed or otherwise eradicated?” Kuai’s anger was so thick it bled into the air around them. Hanzo had tried to invoke the man’s temper before, but not like this. This was beyond anything he’d seen from Kuai before. “No, why wouldn’t I want the one last thing I could have to remember him by? Why wouldn’t I be fucking furious you kept it from me? Why wouldn’t I be angry that you kept a fucking trophy from the innocent man you murdered in cold blood?”

Hanzo had no idea what to say, all he could do was watch with an uneasy feeling settling in his stomach as Kuai bowed his head and let out a loud sob.

A sob so guttural and broken that Hanzo didn’t need a safeword to know it wasn’t because of their games.

“Why are you the only one allowed to grieve?” Kuai asked, voice completely wrecked and sounding so very broken.

This was far worse than the Cyber Lin Kuei incident. Maybe because this was something Hanzo’s actions caused. Despite their unease and rivalry, it was disturbing to see Kuai so utterly defeated. He didn’t have any answers to any of Kuai’s questions. He didn’t know that Kuai had none of Bi-Han’s belongings left, he didn’t know why he hadn’t mentioned it to him.

He didn’t even know why he’d kept it after learning the truth of his families murder.

“Kuai Liang,” He started, awkwardly shoving his dick back into his pants. He got down on one knee, trying to be more on eye level. “Why didn’t you ask me for it, instead of trying to steal it?”

“Would you have given it to me?” Kuai looked Hanzo dead in the eye as he asked. His eyes were red and there were tears streaming down his cheeks.

And once again, Hanzo did not have an answer. He genuinely did not know if he would have given the mask to Kuai if he’d asked. There was a part of him that felt he’d have clung on to reckless pride and denied knowing what Kuai was talking about. At Hanzo’s silence, Kuai began to laugh, although it sounded strained and cracked.

“You are a fucking terrible person,” he snivelled, bowing his head once again. His chest heaved and shoulders shook.

“I know,” Hanzo agreed, reaching one hand forward to push Kuai’s hair off his face, while the other went to start undoing the restraints. “But I do want to be a better one.”

Kuai didn’t reply to that, but Hanzo slowly undid all the chains and shackles. Despite being free, Kuai did not try to get up and leave, he just lent forward, bracing himself on his hands and he continued to cry. Hanzo risked patting his head a couple of times, before standing up and stepping away. He let his flames engulf him, the cell disappearing in the whirlwind.

He remerged in the treasure room, right in front of the mask in question. He gingerly reached for it, using his thumb to explore the detailing on it. One day, maybe he would truly make up for his sins, but until then, he could at least to the right thing for this situation.

Once again the flames came, and he was back in the cell. He was surprised Kuai was still here, but he supposed he was glad that he hadn’t attempted to run in his distraught state. Approaching again, he got back onto his knees, grasping one of Kuai’s wrists. He brought his hand up, flipping it over so the palm was facing up.

He then placed the mask in Kuai’s hand.

Kuai’s breathing hitched, and he slowly looked up at his hand. He observed the mask for a couple of seconds, before bringing his other hand to grasp it carefully. His mouth opened as he gently stroked the mask with his thumbs. Finally, Kuai looked up at Hanzo. He still looked completely and utterly emotionally wrecked, but that anger and hatred was no longer shining in his eyes.

“Thank you,” Kuai croaked out, carefully pulling the mask to his chest, nursing it like he was hugging it. “Thank you.”

Hanzo sighed and manoeuvred to sit down on the floor. He observed the other man, his body was limp, like everything was just too heavy for him in that moment. While the point of contention was now somewhat eliminated, Hanzo realised there was a strangely disturbing trend emerging.

“Kuai Liang, why do you always try to solve your problems with sex?” He asked, expected some sort of denial from Kuai about that being what he did. It never came, instead Kuai gave him a tired smile.

“Because it’s the only thing makes me feel good.” Kuai’s head swayed slightly, while Hanzo could only sit and feel the horror of that sentence sink into his bones. “Can I be honest, Hanzo?” Despite his reservations as to what was about to be said, Hanzo gave an affirmative hum. “If we weren’t fucking on the regular, I would have killed myself years ago.”

What the fuck was Hanzo supposed to say to that sentence?

He had always suspected Kuai to be slightly depressed, but he had no idea that it was to this level. How had he not noticed this before? Had anyone noticed this? Kuai had friends in the Special Forces, surely one of them must have noticed.

“Every relationship I’ve had seemed to end up bringing me nothing but pain,” Kuai continued, seeming to realise Hanzo had no idea what to say. “At least with you, I know exactly where we stand, and that the pain was a part of the package from the start. When you tell me that I belong to you, it’s the closest anyone’s ever come to telling me they love me.” Kuai’s eyes flicked down to the mask. “When I found out you were keeping this from me, it felt like just one more knife in my back. Like I didn’t know where we stand after all.”

“You are right about me being a terrible person, if I was so blind to not see the pain you have been in all this time,” Hanzo agreed. He could see now that with everything they’d been through, why this one small action Hanzo had barely thought of would be such a huge betrayal to the Grandmaster of the Lin Kuei. “I am not exactly an expert at managing pain but, have you ever considered going to therapy?”

Kuai laughed, thankfully a little less wrecked this time. “Careful, you’re starting to sound like Jonathan.”

Ah, so it seemed Cage knew about Kuai’s struggles. At least someone knew. At least someone wanted to help him.

“It is just, none of what you’ve told me is healthy,” Hanzo slowly informed him. Kuai looked back up at him with a look that screamed “well duh”. Hanzo chuckled, “I know. I’m sorry. I just do not know what I can do to help you.”

“That’s not your burden,” Kuai softly informed him.

“No, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t take accountability for my part in your pain.” He carefully reached over, placing his hand on Kuai’s head. “I can not do anything to take back what I’ve done to you, but I will do what I can to lessen any future suffering.”

“Unless it’s in the bedroom,” Kuai slyly replied, before sighing and closing his eyes. “Maybe I do need therapy. When it was just Jonathan telling me I needed it, it was easier to bury my head in the sand. But if even you think I need help, maybe there is some truth behind it.”

“It might be for the best,” Hanzo agreed, gently carding his hand through Kuai’s hair. “I think you’d benefit from someone more qualified than my dick.”

“Oh, I don’t know, I’d say your dick was more than qualified for the position,” Kuai laughed, and Hanzo had never been so thankful to see him smiling. “This- uh. Does this change things between us?”

“No, but I do think we need to make some adjustments to our relationship,” Hanzo decided, maybe it was out of a selfish desire to keep fucking the other man. He preferred to think it was the best way of keeping Kuai safe. Having him within arms reach lest he begin to fall further into his depression. “In particular, if there are issues, we need to be able to actually talk about them.”

“Of course,” Kuai agreed with a nod. “I will also try to stop initiating sex when I’m running on raw emotions.”

“Good,” Hanzo agreed, pushing himself to stand and holding out a hand to Kuai. The other man accepted it, and Hanzo hauled him to his feet. “We should discuss this in more detail, maybe over tea.” Hanzo did not let go of Kuai’s hand, and began to lead him out of the cell. “And then maybe I can find a way to things up to you.”

The way Kuai raised an eyebrow indicated he understood the implications. “What about not solving everything with sex?”

“Well, technically we have already solved this without sex. This is more me showing you that as much as you belong to me, I also belong to you.” It felt strange, allowing another to claim ownership of him. The bite mark on his shoulder began to tingle slightly. “Besides, are you really going to say no to tying me to the bed and riding me for hours?”

“Good point,” Kuai flatly said, but there was a shine in his eye now that was previously missing. “Tea and talk first, then we’ll see what happens.”

Despite everything, maybe, just maybe, there was a way the two of them could make this strange fucked up relationship work.

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