So Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want This Time

Kuai Liang felt himself being thrown against the wall, pain blossomed in his side where hours earlier he’d been struck with a metal pipe. Seconds after he hit the wall, a hand wrapped around his neck and began to squeeze. He choked slightly, hands reaching up to claw at the hand while he stared Sektor straight in the eyes.

Kuai didn’t really remember when Sektor started calling him snowstorm, but now that he thought about it, the nickname really told how Sektor viewed Kuai. He was an oncoming storm, wild and out of control, completely unpredictable and impossible to tame. Unruly. Destructive. Uncooperative. Something that Sektor desperately wanted to get under his control.

“S-Sektor,” Kuai whispered, hoping that wouldn’t cause him to do anything rash. “Please.”

Sektor laughed bitterly, “oh now you want to grovel.” He lent in closer, face practically touching Kuai’s. “You were so mouthy and proud of yourself in front of my father.” Kuai just stilled under Sektor, not really wanting to provoke him further. “You realise that because I was assigned to dish out your punishment, every time you act out like a little bitch, it makes me look bad in turn?”

“Oh no, what a shame,” Kuai sarcastically replied before he could stop himself. The second it slipped from his lips, his eyes widened, watching the way Sektor’s face warped. “I- I- I didn’t mean that, I’m sorry.” Kuai felt the panic rise in his chest when his pathetic apologies were clearly not being accepted. “I am so sorry, I’ll be better next time I promise.”

To his relief, the hand around his throat retreated, only to feel himself being yanked forward. The world spun as he was thrown in a completely different direction, side protesting the action. He fell back onto something soft. Lifting his head, it took him an embarrassing couple of seconds to realise he was on Sektor’s bed, with Sektor himself standing above him.

He looked so god damn pissed, face twisted and teeth bared, his chest heaving from how heavy he was breathing.

“I-I really am sorry.” He didn’t know if this would work. He just didn’t want this to escalate, especially when he was already injured. He scrambled to sit up slightly. “I’ll make it up to you.”

“You’d fucking better,” Sektor hissed between his teeth. “This shit is why you haven’t earned a name yet.”

Kuai flinched at that. Somehow that hurt more than any physical blow Sektor could have delivered to him. Actually at this point Kuai wished it had been a punch. That would be easier to deal with. The fact he still had not received his codename was a very sore point. Most Lin Kuei got theirs in their early to mid teens, and yet Kuai Liang was 19 and had still not done enough in the eyes of the Grandmaster. He really didn’t know how much more he could give.

“Did I hit a nerve?” Sektor asked, voice dripping with poison. “Now you know how I feel every time you do stupid shit that reflects badly on me.”

“I’m sorry,” Kuai whispered, keeping his head low. All he’d done was ask for clarification on an order he didn’t fully understand. He’d just wanted to make sure he got it right, he really wasn’t trying to be disrespectful or disobey. Was that really a crime that justified this screaming and berating?

“Oh, you are always sorry, Snowstorm.” Sektor took a few steps forward, and then there was a hand hooking under Kuai’s chin and forcing his face up. “The problem is you’re never sorry enough to actually make any changes.”

He tried. As the Elder Gods themselves as his witness, he swore he tried. The expectations of him just always seemed to change, they constantly moved the goal posts and he couldn’t keep up. He swore they didn’t seem to do this with anyone but him. They’d already decided he was a failure, and they were determined to make that a self-fulfilling prophecy.

“I know. I’ll do better. I will.” He knew that he couldn’t. He would never be better, and they’d never accept he was even trying to be better. But if saying it would placate Sektor, it was worth lying his ass off about.

Sektor didn’t reply, just pulled away with an annoyed sigh. Thankfully Kuai was well versed at this point in distracting Sektor from his anger. He knew exactly what would turn this situation around.

He slid off the bed, allowing himself to kneel on the floor before Sektor. His hands reached to Sektor’s hips, loosely clinging to Sektor’s belt. He tried to ignore the throbbing pain in his side from the bruising lacing his ribs.

“Let me make it up to you,” Kuai purred, carefully tugging on Sektor’s trousers.

Sektor huffed, reaching down to slap Kuai’s hand away. Initially, Kuai assumed his advances were being rejected, until Sektor hissed at him “hands behind your back.”

Kuai gave a relieved sigh, putting his hands behind his back like he was told. As he did so, Sektor reached for his belt, undoing it and moving the fabric of his trousers down just enough for his cock to spring free. He was already half hard, clearly Kuai Liang’s pleading had begun to get him fired up. Typical.

“Open your mouth,” Sektor ordered, reaching one hand to stroke his cock slightly, trying to coax it to further harden. Kuai did as he was told, letting his mouth hang open, ready and waiting for what Sektor intended to give him. Sektor tutted. “Of course you can follow these sorts of orders, whore.”

Before Kuai could do or say anything in retaliation, Sektor surged forward, lining his cock up with Kuai’s open mouth and thrusting in. With one swift motion, Sektor’s cock hit the back of his throat, causing Kuai to gag.

There was very little ceremony and certainly no foreplay. Sektor grabbed the back of Kuai’s head, using his hair as an anchor. The thrusts were fast and rough, barely giving Kuai a chance to prepare for the onslaught. He gagged a few more times, something he hadn’t really done in a while.

Sektor didn’t pause, and Kuai was okay with that. He could handle it, actually he rather enjoyed it. Being dominated, being subservient and submissive. It excited him in ways it probably shouldn’t. The fact his own cock was stirring in his pants was a testament to that.

“Fuck. At least there’s one thing you’re good at,” Sektor growled, throwing his head back and shoving himself in as far as he could.

Something about that made Kuai happy. It wasn’t exactly praise, but it was the closest to it he’d had in a long time. He purred around Sektor’s cock, pushing the flat of his tongue against the length as Sektor continued to thrust in and out. The loud groan told Kuai his efforts were appreciated. With Sektor setting the pace so thoroughly, it was the only way he could really contribute.

He wasn’t sure how long they were there for, time seemed to mean nothing when he could feel his knees start to ache from where they rubbed against the stone floor. His jaw painfully locked in place as Sektor used his mouth. The taste of precum smearing across his tongue with every thrust. Kuai desperately kept his hands clasped together, nails digging into the opposite hand in an attempt to stop himself from reaching down for his own cock. He hadn’t been given permission yet, and he knew Sektor would be displeased if he disobeyed now.

Suddenly, Sektor pulled Kuai forwards, until his nose was touching Sektor’s pelvis. Hands kept him still in place, as his mouth was filled with cum. The salty taste hit his tongue and the back of his throat immediately. Sektor rocked his hips back and forth a couple of more times, before finally pulling out with a wet pop. Kuai closed his eyes and swallowed, hearing the unmistakable sound of fabric.

When Kuai reopened his eyes, Sektor was turned away, fiddling with his clothing, replacing his cock in his pants. Kuai gave a happy sigh, and whispered “I love you.”

Sektor stilled, going completely rigid for a few seconds. He then continued to put himself back into place, completely ignoring what Kuai Liang had just said. It was always like this, but that was okay. Sektor didn’t have to say it back, Kuai Liang could vocalise it for the both of them.

“I need to go talk to my father, to fix your mess,” Sektor snarled, finally turning back to Kuai and pointing at his face. “You will stay right here and wait for me to return. I am not done with you. If I find out you have left this room at any point, you will regret it.”

Kuai took the hand in front of him, pulling it to his mouth as he kissed Sektor’s knuckles. “I’ll wait for you.”

Sektor gave a cruel laugh, the sort where it was clear that Kuai was exactly where the other man wanted him. He patted Kuai’s face a couple of times, before straightening himself out, and striding towards the door.

With a slam of the door, Sektor was gone, and Kuai was left still kneeling on the floor. He smiled to himself, letting himself lean back against the bed. He held his hands to his chest, as if his feelings were so large they were about to burst out, and this was the only way to keep them contained.

But… there were no feelings.

There were no butterflies, no heart palpitations, no feelings of breathlessness. All he felt was a deep sinking emptiness. Like his chest was completely void, his entire soul having been carved out of his body. His hand curled up into a fist, taking a deep breath to try and ground himself.

This was fine. Everything was fine. This was just how he felt after every encounter they had, he was used to it by now. He’d wanted it this way. Sure, Sektor wouldn’t say those three simple words back to him, but that was just what Sektor was like. He couldn’t say them, he couldn’t show affection because if anyone found out it would be seen as a weakness. Definitely not something the next Grandmaster of the Lin Kuei should be showing.

Yet Kuai could not deny that he craved it. He craved Sektor telling him he loved him. He craved soft touches and lazy mornings. Just the two of them holding each other close. Maybe if he was lucky, when Sektor became Grandmaster, he’d get what he wanted.

He closed his eyes, ignoring the hollowness and the tears that rolled down his cheeks, and imagined a future where he and Sektor did not have to hide anymore.

“From this day on, you shall be known as Tundra.”

Kuai bowed in respect towards Grandmaster Oniro, despite knowing full well this code name was yet another indication of all his deficiencies.

Tundra. Hardly the most intimidating of names, it sounded like it belonged to a cuddly puppy than a trained assassin. Maybe to some it would bring to mind harsh conditions and barren wilderness, but to Kuai Liang it just sounded… Soft. Like The Lin Kuei’s elders accused him of being far too often. They wanted him to be harsher, yet they gave him a name like that?

And the way Grandmaster Oniro looked at him, sneering and spiteful. As if this name was meant to twist in the knife representing the fact Kuai Liang would never be Sub Zero. He had accepted a long time ago that Bi-Han deserved the title far more than he ever would, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t hurtful to have it thrown in his face. That he’d never be good enough to be Sub Zero, even if something were to happen to Bi-Han.

But what could he say? He couldn’t voice displeasure at the name, that would just earn him even more trouble. They could even take his name away from him. Even if Tundra was given to him as an insult, he’d still worked hard to earn the name, he couldn’t lose it now just because he wanted to be a spoilt brat about it.

And really, he should be thankful that Sektor hadn’t wormed his opinion in and ensured his codename was Snowstorm. As in love as he was with Sektor, sometimes the way the man made every action he took towards Kuai into some weird power play made Kuai’s skin crawl. So, at the very least, for now Sektor didn’t have that kind of control over his life.

What the fuck will it be like when Sektor becomes Grandmaster?

He pushed those feelings aside, straightening up from his bow and stating “I am honoured to be assigned my codename, Grandmaster.”

“As you should be,” the Grandmaster spoke in a condescending tone. “It took you far too long, but I will admit, you actually did a good job on the Benjamin Ward assignment. Maybe there is more to you than we initially thought.”

Kuai fought so fucking hard to not let his surprise show. The fact the Grandmaster even remotely acknowledged that Kuai had actually done something well was shocking. He had to remain passive however, he couldn’t let it show how much the praise actually meant to him. That’d be a good way to ensure he never received any recognition ever again.

“I hope to continue to prove my worth to you, Grandmaster.” He wasn’t stupid. He knew this would likely be the only time he’d ever get that kind of compliment on his work.

“Let’s not get too ahead of ourselves,” the Grandmaster grumbled, and any high Kuai might have been feeling from the compliment went crashing down around him. “You still have a long way to go before I will accept we made the right choice in not executing you a long time ago.” Despite the urge to lower his head at that, Kuai kept it held high, knowing that the Grandmaster was saying these to get a reaction. “But, your bloodline is a prestigious one, and even one such as yourself could pass on your cryomancy genes to the next, and hopefully better, generation.”

Kuai almost bit his lip at that. Passing on my genes. He wondered how the Grandmaster would react if he knew that most likely wasn’t going to happen. Sektor had made it pretty clear to Kuai that once he became Grandmaster, his intent was to keep Kuai as his consort. And well…

Children between them wasn’t exactly possible, biologically speaking.

Though he supposed there were always other ways for him to have children. Not that Sektor would ever let him do those. He was far too possessive for anything like that.

“Regardless. The title is yours,” the Grandmaster continued, blissfully unaware that his son was fucking Kuai senseless most nights. “I do hope that I won’t come to regret giving it to you.”

“You won’t, Grandmaster.” Kuai bowed again, and the Grandmaster gave a rough sigh.

“You are dismissed, Tundra.”

Kuai didn’t stick around to be reprimanded for disobeying such a clear direction. He turned on his heel and made his way to the exit of the throne room. Once he stepped out into the corridor, shutting the large heavy doors behind him, he let out a sigh of relief. He’d made it through that with only a few hurt feelings. Despite his disappointment at himself, it could have gone so much worse.

A grey blur caught his eye, seconds before Tomas' face loomed in front of his own, hands grasping Kuai’s shoulders and eyes wide.

“Well? What happened? Are you okay? What did they want? Can I do anything to help, Kuai Liang?” The questions came at a mile a minute and Kuai almost laughed in poor Tomas face. It was nice though, that someone was concerned about him.

“I think you mean, can I do anything to help, Tundra,” Kuai corrected with a small grin, watching Tomas' face fall in confusion before it lit up in pure delight.

“You got your name?” He asked, and Kuai nodded in response. “Yes!”

Tomas suddenly grabbed Kuai around the waist, hauling him up into the air and spinning him around. Kuai giggled, even knowing that if anyone caught them they’d both get in trouble for it. Tomas seemed to remember himself and his surroundings, and quickly placed Kuai back on the ground.

“Sorry. I was excited,” he explained, reaching to brush his hair out of his face and revealing a bright red blush across his features.

“You seem more excited about it than I am,” Kuai joked, although really, Tomas did seem to be more elated by the news.

“So, how do you feel, Tundra?” Tomas asked gleefully, bouncing a little on the balls of his feet and grinning ear to ear. Kuai gave him a small smile, it was hard not to with the energy that Tomas was radiating.

“I’m proud,” he said shortly, hoping the sweet smile was enough to hide his real thoughts. I’m a failure.

“You should be,” Tomas cheered, throwing his arm around Kuai’s shoulders. He pulled Kuai close and lowered his voice to a whisper. “So, Cyrax and I were thinking about sneaking out later, and now we actually have something to celebrate, if you’re feeling like it.”

“Ah, you mean I get to break my first rule now I’m officially Tundra,” Kuai replied quietly, trying not to giggle too loudly. “You know I can’t resist that.”

“Great.” Tomas pulled Kuai into a small alcove. “We’re gonna slip out about 9pm, separately and then meet at the old watchtower. We’ll wait for about 20 minutes, so try not to be late.”

“Got it,” Kuai claimed with a grin.

Sure, he still felt useless, but at least he could try and put that aside by celebrating this minor achievement with two of his favourite people.

“Fucking take it, you slut!”

Kuai hissed as the man thrust inside him with speed and power. The man was holding Kuai’s wrists above his head with one hand, the other being used to occasionally grope and slap various parts of Kuai’s body. The problem was this man was obviously still holding back somewhat, and Kuai did not want that. He wanted to be absolutely ruined by this man.

He didn’t know the man’s name. He never knew the names of anyone he slept with, and he was just fine with that. In turn, they never knew his name either, in this setting he was exclusively known as either slut, or whore, or bitch. He made sure to find men who just wanted one night of rough no-holds-barred sex. One night where they could be as degrading as they wanted to be, because that’s exactly what Kuai Liang desired. He was tough enough to take anything they could throw at him.

Which is why it was annoying to him that this man was clearly holding back.

“Is this all you’ve got?” Kuai taunted, rolling his hips in time to the man’s thrust. When he saw the way the man’s face warped into displeasure, he knew he was about to get the reaction he wanted. “I can barely feel anything.”

The man responded by slamming the palm on his hand against Kuai’s face, hard enough to make Kuai’s head snap to one side.

Kuai laughed, “that’s more like it.”

“Fuck, you’re a masochist,” the man groaned, grabbing Kuai’s chin and forcing him to look at him again. “You really just want to be used as an object, don’t you?”

“Yes,” Kuai replied with a dreamy sigh, a lewd moan escaping his lips as the man's cock hit his prostate. God he was so close, he just needed a little more.

The man pressed Kuai’s wrists harder against the mattress, free hand roaming Kuai’s body, now with renewed purpose. Feeling at Kuai’s pecs, the touch was far more demanding, hard enough that it could possibly leave marks or bruises. Plucking at Kuai’s nipples and stretching them far longer than he should have. Running his nails down Kuai Liang’s sides, hard enough that Kuai could feel blood bead from where the skin split. Occasionally returning to Kuai’s face to slap him again.

This is what he needed. This is what he deserved.

All it took was one more hard thrust and Kuai Liang was coming. He arched his back off the bed and groaned. The man didn’t stop though, just kept thrusting and chasing his own pleasure. It was only when he gave a loud groan that Kuai knew he’d also reached orgasm. There was no feeling of being filled, the condom made sure of that. He would forever be thankful to Cyrax for pulling him aside as a teenager and teaching him of the dangers sex could present. No one else would have done so.

The man jerked his hips back and forth a couple more times, Kuai could feel him growing soft inside him. Eventually, he released Kuai’s wrists, pulling out and away.

Kuai lowered his arms to cover his face, making a satisfied noise. It had taken some provoking, but he’d gotten what he wanted in the end. He smiled to himself, panting and really soaking in the afterglow. The pleasure was still there, deep in his stomach, even as various parts of him began to ache from the rough treatment. That just amplified the bliss for him.

He was brought out of his stupor when he heard the sound of fabric rustling. He brought his arms down and shifted onto his side, watching as the man collected his clothes off the floor and began to put them back on. Kuai pouted slightly.

“Not going to stay for a second round?” Kuai questioned, resting his head on his hand and giving the most smolderingly lustful look he could give at that moment.

The man gave a tut and replied with “fucking hell, a bit insatiable, aren’t you?”

“So I’ve been told.” And he had. By many of the men he’d brought back here. Thankfully a lot of them were as sexually hungry as he was, and were more than willing to go all night until Kuai just couldn’t physically handle any more.

“I have work in the morning,” the man explained, and Kuai couldn’t help but feel it was a weak excuse. Who goes out to a bar on a night they have to go to work? “So… Yeah.”

“Right. That's… fine.” He tried not to sound disappointed. He was, but he didn’t want it to show. It’d been a while since he found someone up for an all nighter, and he’d hoped this would be one. But hey. When exactly did Kuai ever get what he wanted? “Thanks for the night.”

“Uh. Yeah, you too.” The man finished putting his clothes on, doing an awkward half bow and half wave as he turned to leave out the door. Kuai watched him go, no point in chasing after someone who didn’t want to be there, especially someone Kuai had no intent on ever seeing again after that night.

But now, he was left alone in his room with only his thoughts for company.

And quite frankly, they tended to be fucking awful company.

He pushed himself onto his back, and stared up at the ceiling. The pleasant feeling in his body began to fade, and all that was left was the ache. His sides stung from where the man's nails had dug into his skin, his chest was tender from how hard the man had squeezed it, his wrists were red and starting to bruise, his cheek was throbbing. And god damn, his ass was sore, deep inside as well, not enough that he was concerned there was damage but enough that it was hard to ignore.

But… this was what I wanted right? To be held down and used like a sex toy. To have someone dominate him so completely. To be fucked so hard he couldn’t breathe or walk right for weeks.

So… why was that empty pit in his chest opening again? The same one he used to get with Sektor. Why did he just want one person to stay with him after the fact and make sure he was okay? That was such a selfish wish, wasn’t it? The world didn’t revolve around him, it was unfair of him to ask for more, especially from strangers.

He ran his hand down his chest, wincing slightly when his fingers hit something wet. He brought his hand up to look at the cum now lacing his fingertips. He just stared at it, his previous high coming crashing down around him.

It wasn’t like he didn’t like the sex, he fucking loved it. At least, he loved it when it was happening. Yet somehow, every single time it was over, he was left feeling like this. Used, useless, craving for something more than the harsh hands he sought out. Something no one seemed to be able to give him. Something no one was willing to give him.

Maybe even something he would never receive.

He wanted to be loved. Some days he felt like his chest would burst from how much he wanted to love someone and have them return those feelings. Even now, after everything Sektor had put him through, he still fucking loved that bastard. But did Sektor love him back? Had Sektor ever loved him back?

Or was a sex toy all Kuai Liang could ever be to someone else?

His breathing hitched and his eyes began to sting. When he blinked to clear his eyes, he felt tears rolling down his face. This was so pathetic. He was a grown man crying over the fact no one would ever love him.

“I’m so fucking stupid,” he muttered to himself, placing his palm against his forehead. “So stupid.”

He closed his eyes, chanting the words so stupid to himself like a fucked up lullaby, waiting for sleep to claim him so that maybe in the morning he wouldn’t feel like such a piece of shit.

If love really did exist, it was clear that it was something the Elder Gods did not intend for him to experience.

“Hey! Grandmaster Blueberry Ice!”

Kuai smirked to himself, eyes closed and lying on his back in the middle of The Lin Kuei’s training courtyard. There was only one person foolish enough to call him by that nickname.

“Hello Jonathan,” Kuai greeted, opening his eyes to see, indeed, Johnny standing over him and looking down with a large grin on his face. “Can I help you?”

Johnny was a creature of habit. One of those habits was giving people the most ridiculous nickname’s Kuai Liang had ever heard. He was the only person who could give people those nicknames and walk away alive too. Kuai would never admit out loud that he was beginning to become fond of the Blueberry Ice nickname. Johnny was still the only person he’d allow to call him it, however.

“Just coming to ask a bit of a favour from my favourite Cryomancer,” Johnny claimed and Kuai gave a sly smile.

“I’m your favourite Cryomancer?” He teasingly questioned. “Or are you just trying to butter me up to get me to go through with some stupid plan you’ve come up with?”

“Excuse you, when have I ever come up with a stupid plan and tried to rope you into it?” Johnny asked, placing his hand on his chest in mock offence.

“Do you really want the list?“ Kuai sighed, pushing himself to sit up, before scrambling to try and actually stand. Johnny held out a hand, and Kuai took it, the other man helping haul him off the floor. “What do you need?”

“So, y’know I’ve been putting together a team with Special Forces?” Johnny asked and Kuai hummed in confirmation. From what Johnny had told him, the team consisted of 4 recruits, and while it sounded like they still had a long way to go in terms of working as a team, they did have a lot of promise. “Well, I was thinking about setting up a little test for them. Just to see how they might handle a difficult situation.”

“And I’m guessing you want The Lin Kuei to be their test?” Kuai assumed, with an eyebrow raised.

“Exactly. But I’m thinking of making it look real to them, y’know. Say that we lost contact with you, and need them to investigate.” Something about that caught Kuai Liang’s attention.

“Are you sure this is a test?” Kuai tilted his head slightly, trying to stop himself from laughing. “Because it rather sounds like you’re asking me to help you prank them.”

“Well, it being a prank doesn’t negate it being a test, it can be both those things.” Johnny shrugged dramatically and stuck his tongue out, and Kuai quickly put a hand over his mouth to hide his amusement. “So, what do you say? Wanna help me prank these kids?”

Kuai couldn’t stop himself from chuckling, shaking his head and saying “you son of a bitch, I’m in.”

“Great,” Johnny cheered, pumping his fist in excitement. “I haven’t worked out all the details yet, but it’ll be easier now I have you on board. I’ll let you know more as I know.”

“Well, why don’t we have a cup of tea and at least discuss some ideas.” Kuai gestured towards the temple.

“God that sounds good.” They both turned and began walking towards the temple, with Johnny bringing up his hands to his biceps and making a brring sound. “I always forget how fucking cold it is up here.” Johnny glanced Kuai up and down. “Doesn’t help you’re constantly walking around with your tits out.”

“Yes, well, I don’t feel the cold like you do,” Kuai said with a shrug. “I’ll light a fire for you, if you’d like.”

“Sounds good.” As they stepped inside, Kuai glanced at Johnny to notice an evil grin emerging on his face. “Speaking of fire…” Before Johnny could continue Kuai groaned, knowing exactly what was coming next. “How’s the Alliance with the Shirai Ryu doing?”

“It’s going well.” Kuai rubbed the back of his head, he wasn’t stupid enough to think the alliance was what Johnny was genuinely interested in. “Hanzo still seems a bit skittish around me, but it’s getting easier I suppose.”

“Uh huh,” Johnny drawled, closing his eyelids slightly and placing a hand on his chin. “So… You still haven’t told him yet, huh?”

Kuai choked on the air, face growing hot. Even knowing it was coming, the discussion of that particular topic still managed to get him flustered.

“No,” Kuai squeaked, hoping they wouldn’t run into any of his students. He didn’t exactly need them seeing him acting like a shy school girl over his crush. “I- I mean, it just seems like a bad idea, especially right now.”

“Is it a bad idea because you don’t think Hanzo will be able to handle your feelings, or a bad idea because you still have hang ups on if you deserve to be loved?” God damn, Johnny knew exactly which hard hitting questions to ask, and more importantly, how to ask them in a way that didn’t mean Kuai felt like he wanted to run for the hills rather than answer.

“A little of both, I guess.” He opened the door to his private quarters, stepping aside to let Johnny in first. He followed and shut the door behind him. “If there’s something that’s very clear to me, it’s that Hanzo very much still loves Harumi, and I do not wish to do anything that would get in the way of his grief.” He paused and sighed, “and well… You already know about the second one.”

“Okay. I am going to let you off this once, cause I agree that Grandmaster Grumpy Face is probably not ready for a new relationship.” Johnny reached forward and gently patted his shoulder. “But I do think you need to tell him how you feel at some point. Because otherwise, those feelings are just gonna eat you alive, and it’ll just get harder to say as time goes by.” Johnny gave him a smile. “And despite what you think, you do deserve to be happy, Kuai Liang.”

Kuai nodded, and smiled slightly. Really his feelings for Hanzo were new and, for the first time in his life, terrifying. He wanted love so badly, but he felt so guilty even thinking of asking that of Hanzo. Then there was that scary thought that even if Hanzo did accept his feelings, it would just end up how it did in the past. Mindless sex with little to no emotion. Kuai Liang giving his all and wearing his heart on his sleeve just for it to be stomped all over.

He didn’t truly believe that Hanzo would be so cruel and callous with him, yet there was a traitorous part of his mind that whispered “but what if he is?”

“I will keep that in mind.” He would, he supposed. One day he’d have to get over his fears. But for now, he could push it away. That was something for future Kuai Liang to worry about. “I’ll get the fire started.”

The conversation thankfully returned back to the subject of the test. Still, even as Johnny and he discussed the details, there was a part of Kuai thinking about Hanzo, and wondering if there really was any possibility that he could be with him.

“I love you, Snowflake.”

Kuai did not stifle his moans as Hanzo kissed along his neck. He was on his back, being gently pressed against the mattress by Hanzo’s body. The pressure was just right, he didn’t feel like he was being smothered, it was more reassuring than that.

One of Hanzo’s hands was on the side of Kuai’s face, the other hooked under one of Kuai’s legs, lifting it up. Kuai’s hands were wrapped around Hanzo’s torso, resting on Hanzo’s back and pushing him closer. Holding him like if he didn’t he’d just disappear from his arms. Another kiss, sucked into the skin of Kuai’s neck reassured him that would not happen.

Hanzo thrusted his hips, gently but expertly aimed. Hitting Kuai’s sweet spot exactly and making his toes curl. He whined, rolling his hips a little to meet Hanzo’s own movements. Everything about this felt amazing, the way Hanzo stretched him out, the way he managed to hit that bundle of nerves every time. Hanzo’s lips were still practically glued to Kuai’s neck, showering him with kisses.

“Hanzo,” Kuai breathed out, arching his back and closing his eyes. “Hanzo.” The name came from his lips like he was giving a sermon. This experience was holy, sacred and Kuai Liang never wanted to stop feeling this way.

Their sex could get rough, they had fun figuring out their shared kinks. But even then it was different from the experiences he’d had before. Hanzo cared about his comfort, it was important to him to know exactly how Kuai was feeling throughout. And when everything was over? He never just left Kuai Liang to deal with the aftermath alone. He was there, doting on Kuai, spoiling him and showering him with adoration.

But then there were nights like this. Nights where there were no harsh touches or words. Only softness that frightened Kuai Liang at first for how foreign it was to him. He was so used to roughness that Hanzo being gentle, like Kuai Liang may break in his hands if he weren’t, was something he was genuinely unsure of at first. Could someone like him be gentle? Did he deserve it?

As Hanzo reached down between their torsos, gripping Kuai’s cock firmly and stroking, Kuai decided he no longer cared if he deserved this or not. This was wonderful, everything Hanzo did was wonderful, and he knew that he would be addicted to the other man's touch for the rest of his life. He couldn’t live without him.

“Hanzo,” Kuai gasped out desperately, fingers working his cock so wonderfully. “Please.”

“Let go, Kuai Liang,” Hanzo whispered in his ear, thumb reaching the head of his cock to circle it.

Kuai couldn’t hold back any longer, he gasped loudly as he came, closing his eyes as the pleasure flowed through him in waves. Hanzo continued to stroke him, helping him chase the aftershocks of pleasure. He knew throughout it all, his hole clenched around Hanzo’s cock, and given how snappy his thrusts were getting, it wouldn’t be long before he was coming too.

Hanzo desperately searched for Kuai’s lips, locking with his own, muffling his own loud moan. Kuai Liang could feel himself being filled, and god, it felt so weird how much of a blissful experience it was. Knowing that even once Hanzo pulled out, that part of him was still deep inside. That meant so much to Kuai in a way not even he could comprehend.

Hanzo broke the kiss, only to pepper a few more light pecks across Kuai’s face. Another display of affection that Kuai Liang adored. He giggled, even as he felt Hanzo remove himself. There was a very brief spike of panic, the fear this would be the day that Hanzo just up and left him. It was quickly snuffed out, when Hanzo’s hands cupped his face.

“Are you well, love?” Hanzo asked, and Kuai almost cried that such a small action made his heart sing.

“I am, thank you.” Kuai lent up to give Hanzo another quick kiss. “Thank you.”

Hanzo chuckled, clearly holding back from telling Kuai that he didn’t have to thank him. “Come on, let’s get cleaned up.”

He moved off the bed, before scooping Kuai up in his arms. Kuai wrapped his arms around Hanzo’s neck, partially for stability, and partially because it helped him feel closer. Hanzo navigated the room, quickly reaching the ensuite bathroom. He carefully placed Kuai down in the tub, running the taps.

“I’ll get the soaps.” Hanzo stood up to go and walk over to the cabinet. He called over his shoulder. “Is there anything else you desire?”

“Could I have some mochi ice cream? Chocolate flavour, of course.” He felt a little silly about the clarification. But Hanzo didn’t say anything, just gave a small amused sigh.

“You can have anything you wish for, Snowflake.”

Snowflake. Hanzo had several pet names for Kuai, but Snowflake was the one that always stood out to Kuai. It felt so much more personal than any of the others.

Kuai thought back at the various names he’d been called over the years. He’d always just accepted them, never really thought about it. Most of the time, the reason for the name was obvious. And while he could think of at least one reason for it, the curiosity on if there was more to Snowflake than he realised was all too much.

“Hanzo,” Kuai softly spoke to get his lover's attention. Hanzo looked over his shoulder, still trying to get out the things he wanted for the bath. “Why do you call me Snowflake?”

Hanzo’s face dropped a little, and in a worried tone he asked “do you not like being called that?”

“Oh, I love it,” Kuai assured him, holding his hands up as if to try and reassure Hanzo. “I was just curious if there was a particular reason for it.” He tilted his head. “Other than it being winter related, that is.”

“I see.” Hanzo finished grabbing what he needed from the cabinet, walking over to place them by the side of the bath. “Well, I guess I call you that, because snowflakes remind me of you.” Hanzo knelt down on the floor beside him. “They float through the air so gracefully, like you on the battlefield. They are delicate, and yet so strong in the right circumstance. They have a tendency to bring delight to those who witness them. Your mere presence in the world changes it. Everyone is different and unique, just as you are amongst our peers.” Hanzo looked straight into Kuai Liang’s eyes and smiled softly as he answered with “and most importantly… They are beautiful, as are you.”

Kuai hiccupped. There they were, the butterflies. There were tears in his eyes, but this time, they were good ones. Even now, the way Hanzo talked about him left him feeling like his heart genuinely could beat from his chest. He was not used to it, and he hoped he never would be just so he could never take Hanzo’s love for granted.

“Are you okay?” Hanzo asked, placing his hand on Kuai’s cheek carefully. Obviously the tears were concerning him.

“I’m wonderful.” Kuai smiled, letting Hanzo see that it was just overwhelming happiness flowing through him. He reached forward himself, placing his hand on Hanzo’s cheek in turn. “You are wonderful.” He lent forward, pressing his lips to Hanzo’s. When he felt the other man kiss him back, he couldn’t help the exhale from his nose. He wrapped his hands around Hanzo’s neck, resting his head on Hanzo’s shoulder, and he happily sighed “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Hanzo replied, his own hands now reaching to cradle Kuai gently. “I am so grateful that you are mine.”

Somehow, all those years of dreaming could not prepare Kuai Liang for how this felt. It wasn’t everything he imagined. No. It was better than anything he’d thought possible for him.

To love, and be loved in return.

Maybe the Elder Gods were smiling down on him after all.

≛ Hurt & Comfort Bingo ≛ Next Fic ⊱
⏎Return To Hurt & Comfort Bingo Masterlist⏎